About Me

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Atlanta, GA, United States
26 years old - Alabama State alumni - certified pharmacy technician - freelance makeup artist

Sunday, August 14, 2011

To Date or Not to Date...That is the Question

I keep going back and forth on whether I want to date or get involved with someone at the moment. Truth is, I need to do me right now. I've been doing me for 4 years so far. That's how long my last relationship has been. It's not because I'm scorned or emotional baggage...nothing like that. Things are not where I want them to be for me to get involved with someone.  I feel like I'm in "transition" state. I just graduated from college last year with a biology degree. I wasn't exactly sure what I wanted to do with it. I knew I wanted to do something in the medical/ allied health field, so I changed my career direction to pharmacy. I started going to Everest Institute in April of this year for a pharmacy tech program and now I am in the process of applying for pharmacy school. I'm not in a position where I am steady. I don't know where I will be going next year for pharmacy school. I don't know if I will be in-state or out-of-state so I don't need to be establishing something in this "temporary" time I have left in Atlanta. That's a year exactly. Don't get me wrong, I've met some nice guys these past couple of months being at home but it's wrong timing. Like I always say, what's meant to be will happen in God's timing. Not mines or his. I'm not gonna lie, being single can be pretty lonely at times and I try to cover it up by saying #teamsingle, I'd rather be single than......but in order to cope with being single you have to be strong and understand that everything happens for a reason and happens at the right timing and season. With me, I feel as if maybe God is telling me I'm not ready to be in a relationship. That maybe I need to love myself a little more so I can appreciate the significant other that he sends my ways even more.  Another thing, I still live with my parents. Not saying that's fully a bad thing. I'm provided with everything I need. There are times where I wish I had my own space and privacy. I choose not to date because I don't want to have to ask permission to talk to a certain guy. I'm not 16. Like I said before, I want to have that stability when I start back. I also don't have a job either. The only income I have really is from my makeup clients and that hasn't been very high lately. I don't want to have to depend on a man for anything. I don't wanna hear no man complain about how he thinks I'm taking his money or I'm just with him for his money. I don't wanna hear the word "golddigger" associated with my name. I want to be stable and established enough where I feel comfortable to date. So I'm comfortable with my decision. I definately feel like it's for the best. I feel like once everything falls into place in my life, then I will let that special man (whoever he will be) walk into my life. The ending results will be great. So like Bey said, It's Me, Myself, and I.....for now.

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